Man Sues Woman For Millions After She “Friend-zoned” Him

Turning down romantic advances from a close male acquaintance often gets women accused of the unimaginable crime of “friend-zoning” them. While most women have similar experiences around this, there is probably nobody who got dragged to court over it — except for Nora Tan Shu Mei.

Kawshigan, reportedly the CEO of a drone tech company in Singapore, sued Mei, stating that she had caused him trauma after rejecting his romantic advances and telling him that she only saw him as a friend.

According to court documents, Kawshigan knew Mei since 2016. He started seeing Mei as a potential partner, but by 2020, he realized she didn’t feel the same. So, in response to her rejection, he brought a defamation lawsuit against her for USD 2.3 million dollars. He argued that the rejection had caused “reductions in his earning capacity” as he experienced “sustained trauma.”

This lawsuit went to high court in February 2023. However, this was only one of his two lawsuits against Mei. Kawshigan had filed a separate case in Singapore’s Magistrate Court over the same accusations, seeking nearly USD 17,000 dollars. In this suit, he alleged that Mei had breached an “offer” she made, which included “offering room for [Kawshigan] to share inspiration, struggle and achievements” and “meeting up based on mutual availability, beyond coffee settings.”

The defendant’s side argued that this early suit was an abuse of process since it came with an ulterior motive to force her into complying with Kawshigan’s demands, which included keeping in touch with him, among other things. Mei also alleged that Kawshigan had appeared outside her house with a woman in July 2022 and remained outside despite her requests for him to leave. He also allegedly placed documents on her door and rattled it that same month. He then approached her neighbors, asked for her home telephone number, and said he would go to her workplace if she refused to communicate with him, she alleged.

She added that Kawshigan went to Ms Tan’s workplace to look for her later that month, but she was not there. As a result of the alleged harassment, Mei installed a digital door viewer, a siren alarm sensor, and a smart video doorbell.

The first lawsuit got struck down for abuse of judicial process in January 2023, and the court ordered Kawshigan to bear Mei’s legal costs.

This case hit a raw nerve of the public, who heavily criticized the regressive mindset behind Kawshigan’s lawsuits. Among the Asian countries, Singapore has the second-highest gender equality level, so this case shocked the public.

Aware Singapore, a women’s rights and gender equality group, released a statement that pretty much summed up the public sentiment surrounding this issue.

Women do not owe men their time or attention, much less their friendship, love, sexual activity, or emotional labor. Attempting to demand or coerce these things, via legal means or otherwise, can constitute harassment.

— Aware Singapore